The girl shakes the guy's hand. Laws of love. Rules for a handshake You can recognize a criminal by appearance

Every woman wants to be loved and adored. When a man looks at his chosen one with delight, it is worth a lot. For personal life to develop harmoniously, both partners must be sexually satisfied. But at the beginning of a relationship, a woman does not always understand what a man wants from her. To understand, it is enough to carefully observe the young man and correctly evaluate his actions and words. If a man wants a woman, the signs will be quite eloquent.

How to recognize sympathy?

Psychologists have identified a number of factors that may indicate that a man has more than just friendly feelings for a woman.

Does a man want a woman?

This question interests every girl at the beginning of a relationship. Of course, the most reliable evidence is the erection that occurs, but it is not always possible to notice it. Therefore, it is worth looking for other ways that will help determine a guy’s desire. If a man wants a woman, signs such as or gestures will definitely give him away.

How can you tell if a guy is excited?

Experts advise paying attention to a number of factors that indicate that a man is excited.

Confidence of a "male"

If a man wants a woman, the signs cannot be hidden. Every young man tries to show his individuality in order to conquer a girl, but there are still common features. In the presence of his chosen one, a man can adjust his tie or belt and touch his face.

When he holds his hands on his belt or on his hips, this is self-confidence and a subconscious call for sex. A man wants a woman to caress these places.

All thoughts are about only one thing...

If a man wants a woman, the signs will “scream” about it. A young man can persistently call a girl home for some completely stupid reasons: to watch a movie, evaluate his renovation, or help him with the design of his apartment.

When a man thinks about sex, he can say vulgar phrases, which sometimes even repel girls. But it’s worth coming to terms with this, since at the moment he is completely focused on his feelings and the desire to possess his chosen one.

Material side

Many girls often think about what are the signs that a man wants a woman. Signs may also relate to the material aspect. When dining in a cafe, a young man will definitely pay for his passion, and will not offer her to split the bill equally. This does not mean that the woman is obliged to spend the night with him, but the man hopes that she will appreciate his generosity.

Some secrets of male psychology

It has long been known that representatives of the stronger and weaker sex differ in nature. Therefore, women should not expect from men what they cannot give them. In order for relationships to develop harmoniously, girls must take into account some of the characteristics of men.

Young people do not know how to vigorously show delight and admiration; they prefer to hide their emotions. Even a small compliment can be regarded as the highest praise. A woman is unlikely to hear words in superlative form.

Almost all men love to interrupt. They do this not on purpose and do not want to offend or belittle their interlocutor. This manner of communication occurs on a subconscious level. A man's brain is designed in such a way that he looks for a solution. Therefore, while the girl is explaining the essence of the question, he can already think through the answer and skip information that, in his opinion, is unnecessary.

When talking with a man, you must first state the main idea, and only then move on to discussing the details.

Young people love to argue, but a woman should not perceive this as a quarrel or disagreement. There is no need to prove anything to a man if the issue is not fundamental. It is much wiser to agree with him and admit the correctness of his arguments.

When a tense situation arises, it is enough for a woman to touch a man and hug him to calm the quarrel. This behavior turns off logic and tunes him to emotions.

The most valuable thing is actions!

The behavior of a man who wants a woman is quite predictable. He will look for meetings with her, call after dates, give flowers and gifts. You should not agree without making sure that the young person has intentions. If he is, he will definitely prove it with his actions and actions. And when a man needs one-time sex, he is unlikely to court for a long time and seek the attention of his passion. Women should remember this so as not to experience a bitter feeling of disappointment later.

True, we do not always immediately understand what this or that gesture means. But nonverbal signs can help us convey to another person what we are embarrassed to say directly in words. Mastering body language is very important if you want to succeed in the art of flirting. You can practice in the coming days - during New Year's parties.

On the threshold

The first signs of sympathy can be seen already upon meeting. Scientists say that four seconds is enough for us to become interested in another person. And then the interest either develops and strengthens, or dissipates. It is important not to fuss if you notice a manifestation of sympathy for you. As a rule, it is the intense desire to be liked that leads to the opposite effect. Here are the signs that someone likes you.

Views

A long look straight into your eyes - a person wants to look into your soul and understand: what if this is a like-minded person?

Having met your gaze, he sharply averts his eyes and deliberately looks to the side, while occasionally glancing at you: this person really liked you in appearance. But he is waiting for a reaction from you. Most likely, he will expect you to take the initiative to start a conversation. If you do nothing, he may be the first to attack. But if you continue to not clearly show your attitude, he will be very upset and even disappointed.

He looks and blinks frequently - another sign of emerging sympathy. Scientists have found that the more we like a person, the more the mucous membrane of the eye dries out when looking at him. The more often we blink accordingly. (Tears of tenderness at the sight of someone is a different story.)

Handshake

If a woman offers her hand with her palm down, she seems to be hinting at kissing her hand. This is both a manifestation of coquetry and an invitation to light flirting.

But if a man offers his hand with his palm down, there is no need to rush to kiss it, this means that he would like to completely subjugate you, and maybe even crush you with authority. In this case, you can simply cover his hand with your palm on top. This will be an unspoken invitation to love rivalry.

Handshake of friendship. If a woman offers her hand to a man like this, then she sees him as an equal partner. If a man loves a woman, he likes her.

A manifestation of an increased desire to be liked and gain trust - clasping your palm with both hands, like a glove. If a man takes a woman’s hand like this, he really wants to gain her sympathy. Especially if she holds her palm a little longer. True, this may scare some women. So don't overdo it.

At the table

A feast is a great place for easy flirting. A caught glance, a correctly understood gesture is the whole game! Some people get so carried away that they forget about food. Here's what some of the details mean.

If a man, looking at a woman, touches his collar or straightens his tie, he really liked this woman.

In this case, women begin to touch their hair. Some people put on a whole show. Now a strand here, now a curl here, now thrown back, now covered with hair. This is how they attract the attention of the object they like.

Watch your hands! A man shows his open palms to a woman - very good. And the woman demonstrates her wrist in all ways: she begins to play with her bracelet, touch her earlobe, her hair, or fiddle with the jewelry on her neck.

The way you sit can also say a lot.

A man, in front of the woman he likes, seems to open up: his chest is like a wheel, his legs are slightly apart and rest firmly on the floor. A clear sexual signal is legs wide apart and an excessive demonstration of confidence with arms bent at the elbows. This should be understood as follows: “I can protect, I am a strong male!”

A woman thirsty for passion sits with her back arched and her legs crossed. If she just wants to evoke sympathy, then she sits down like a proper girl, slightly tilting her ankles together to the side. A woman who wants both will beautifully fold her legs into an “X,” bending at the waist and leaning her elbows on the back of the chair.

On the dance floor

It is worth watching a dancing person, and you will understand a lot about him, even without being an experienced psychologist.

The man put his thumbs in his belt - this is already an obvious sexual challenge.

A woman, if she wants to show that the challenge has been accepted, lets her hair down or changes her hairstyle to a looser one. Often runs his hands through his hair and shakes his head like a mane. Even if she has short hair.

Does the woman look sideways and smile, or does she not look away for a long time? This is also a good sign. In such cases, men glance over a woman’s body from head to toe and back.

When a woman strokes her body in a dance, she seems to be sending a signal: “I want you to do this!” (It is only important that this signal is deciphered by the person to whom it is addressed, and not by all the party participants. - Ed.)

Only numbers:

It takes 4 - 6 seconds to make a first impression.

7 seconds - that’s how long the gaze into the eyes lasts, which immediately brings you closer.

55% of success in love and career depends on nonverbal communication. For example, this is why Americans smile all the time.

Psychological workshop

How to signal?

Advice for men

Nothing turns women on more than light touches. Not just anyone, of course, but the man who has already aroused sympathy. Give her or ask her to hand you some small objects like a lighter, cup, Christmas ball, etc. Touching your fingers and palms is very erotic. As you pass by, you can give them a friendly hug. In a conversation, agreeing with her point of view, you can touch her wrist or forearm.

Watching her from afar, but so that she notices it, is a powerful means of influencing a woman. When you meet her gaze, you need to smile slightly. You are guaranteed sympathy from this woman.

Advice for women

An open natural smile, sparkling eyes - this is enough for a man to catch your signal and prepare for an attack.

Walk directly in front of him: straight back, smooth, short step, in which the hips sway slightly, and the heel of one foot is lifted behind the toe of the other. It would be nice not to fall while doing this, of course. Although you can fall, it is advisable for him to catch you just in time. A woman who falls into the hands of a man is considered saved and immediately becomes very desirable (tested from the personal experience of the author of the article!).

Test

How well do you understand people without words?

1. How do you greet good friends:

A) joyfully shout “Hello!”;
b) a hearty handshake;
c) lightly hug each other;
d) rather restrained;
d) kiss on the cheeks.

2. Which part of your face is most expressive:

A) forehead;
b) eyebrows;
in the eyes;
d) nose;
e) lips;
e) corners of the mouth.

3. When you pass by a shop window where your reflection is visible, what do you pay attention to most:

A) on clothes;
b) on the hairstyle;
c) gait;
d) on posture;
d) no matter what.

4. If someone covers their mouth with their hand while talking or laughing, what does this mean in your opinion:

A) he has something to hide;
b) he has ugly teeth;
c) he is ashamed of something.

5. If your interlocutor averts his eyes, it means he...

A) lies;
b) not confident in himself;
c) collected and calm.

6. You can recognize a criminal by appearance:

A) yes;
b) no;
c) I don’t know.

7. A man comes up to meet a woman. Why is he doing this?

A) The man must take the first step.
b) The woman made it clear that she would like to be spoken to.
c) He is brave enough not to be afraid of being rejected.

8. You have the impression that the person’s words do not correspond to his gestures and facial expressions. Which will you believe more?

A) words;

B) gestures and facial expressions;
c) it will arouse suspicion.

9. Pop stars on stage constantly show gestures with obvious erotic overtones. What do you think lies behind this?

The time has come for the third article, and, this time, it will focus on a previously raised topic - the rules of a handshake for men. We have already talked about the existence of three different types of handshakes and their interpretation, but today we will dwell on this issue in more detail. Let's get started!

If you are quite sociable or because of the nature of your work you meet a large number of people during the day, then you probably have to shake hands often when answering greetings. Perhaps among friends, a handshake takes on greater “meaning”, especially if you are really happy to meet this or that person, but, more often than not, this ritual is perceived as an ordinary formality that must be performed. Behind all this veil of everyday life, consisting of a huge number of conventions, it is very difficult not only to analyze the greetings of other people, but also to simply understand why this extremely familiar ritual is actually performed. What exactly is a handshake? When is it appropriate to offer your hand in greeting and when is it not? How can you tell by a handshake what kind of person is in front of you? Today we will try to understand each of these issues.

History of the handshake

Few people know, but shaking hands is a rather ancient gesture. We will not delve into history, but, for example, this ritual is attested to in a bas-relief depicting the Babylonian king Marduk-zakir-shumi I shaking hands with the Assyrian king Shalmananaser III. This episode occurred in 855 BC. An impressive figure, isn't it? There is also a version, probably the most romantic and beautiful, that this gesture found its popularity during the Middle Ages at knightly tournaments. Despite the large number of hypotheses, the meaning of a handshake has always remained the same - to show the absence of a weapon in the right hand and, as a result, to demonstrate good intentions. Agree, it is more pleasant to shake hands with your boss or acquaintance, imagining yourself as a noble knight, than to do it without any reflection.

The knights' handshake is a gesture of respect at knightly tournaments

Speaking about the history of handshakes in Russia, it is worth noting that it had the sacred meaning of transmitting biorhythm, since when the wrists touch, the pulse also connects. It was customary to shake hands only with friends, while when greeting other people, it was enough to raise your hat. This is where the expression “casual acquaintance” comes from.

Handshake etiquette and rules

The history of the handshake may have a belligerent origin, but nowadays it is, first and foremost, a greeting, and, like any greeting, it must follow the rules of etiquette.

There are a few simple rules that any self-respecting gentleman must follow:

• The right hand is always offered for a handshake (this also applies to left-handers). Your free hand should not be in your pocket.
• When offering your hand for greeting, you should not keep it relaxed, just as you should not squeeze the other person’s palm too hard. The handshake should be calm, firm (not to be confused with strong) and short.
• If you are introduced to another person, he should extend his hand first.
• When meeting a woman, she decides whether there will be a handshake or not. Etiquette dictates that a woman should offer her hand first. When people of different ages meet, the initiative to make the first move belongs to the one who is older. If your opponent decides to make do with a bow, nod or other gesture, you should not insist on a handshake, as your hand may simply hang in the air without an answer, and you will find yourself in an unpleasant situation.
• If you meet with a group of people, among whom there is an acquaintance, etiquette obliges you to shake hands with everyone present.
• Etiquette requires men to remove their gloves before greeting. This rule has exceptions, for example, in the winter season. Both hands participating in the ritual must be either gloved or without them. If your friend managed to take off his glove, you will have to follow his example.
• When leaving a small company, it would be appropriate to shake hands with everyone present. If there are many people gathered, a verbal farewell will be sufficient.

Sign language. Palms

Let's move on to our main issue, namely, sign language. When talking about a handshake, one cannot fail to mention the palms; after all, it is the palms that are involved in this ritual.

Fun fact. At all times, an open palm has been associated with honesty and sincerity. That is why oaths are taken with the palm of the hand on the heart, and abroad, when testifying in court, the Bible is held in the left hand and the right hand is raised up so that it is visible to the members of the court. These traditions are not without foundation, since the position of the palms can really make it clear about a person’s intentions.

The easiest way to tell if the recipient is sincere with you is to watch his palms. When people are being honest, they hold out one or two palms while saying something like, “I'll be honest with you!” When the recipient is frank enough, he opens his palms completely or partially. Like many gestures, this movement is completely unconscious.

• When children lie, they hide their palms behind their backs.
• If the wife wants to hide where she was all night, during explanations she will hide her palms in her pockets or keep them crossed.

A natural question arises. If I lie, but keep my palms in sight, will they believe me? It is impossible to give a definite answer. There are many other gestures that accompany lying. If they are noticeable, they will allow you to doubt your sincerity. On the contrary, if there are no noticeable ones, then, most likely, other gestures symbolizing your sincerity will also not be noticeable. We will not delve into this topic, since the purpose of this article is to interpret gestures, and not to teach how to lie to others. Instead, here's some pretty helpful advice. To increase the trust of others, make it a habit to keep your palms open while talking. This will encourage your interlocutors to be more open and trusting with you. In addition, this will reduce the number of lies both in your speech and in the speech of your interlocutors, since most people cannot lie when their palms are open.

One of the most significant and subtle non-verbal signals is the signal transmitted by the human palm. When used correctly, it gives people a greater level of authority and, in some cases, the ability to command others.

There are three types of command gestures. Let's look at them using a specific example. You should ask, for example, a colleague at work to pick up a box from the floor and place it on a cabinet, using the same words, tone of voice and facial expression. Only the position of the palm will change.

1. Open palm up position. Does not carry any threatening context. Seeing such a gesture, the person will not feel any pressure from you and will perceive all this as an ordinary request.
2. Open palm down position. This gesture carries a connotation of authority. With some probability it may cause hostility, since a person may perceive this situation as an order. If your colleague is of an equal position with you, the request may not be fulfilled.
3. "Pointing finger." Associated with coercion into submission. It is one of the most annoying gestures during dialogue. If you actively use this gesture, then try to replace it with the two previous gestures. This will help you achieve greater success in communicating with others.

Sign language. Handshake

In one of the previous articles, we already looked at the types of handshake. Depending on the position of the palms, it can denote superiority, submission and equality. To refresh your memories, let's give an example.

You meet someone for the first time, and you greet each other with a regular handshake. Depending on the position of your recipient's palm, it may mean the following:

1. Palm facing down - “This guy is trying to put pressure on me, I should be careful.”
2. Palm facing upward - “Perhaps I can put pressure on this person, it’s worth taking this fact into account.”
3. Palms parallel to each other - “I definitely like this guy. We'll get along."

This information is transmitted unconsciously; after a series of training, you can train yourself to use this or that handshake to have the desired effect on others.

It is worth noting that there are exceptions to the rules. For example, people suffering from arthritis are forced to respond with a weak handshake. A limp handshake is also typical for a number of professions, for example, surgeons and musicians.

To accurately determine what kind of person is in front of you, observe his subsequent actions. A compliant person, in the future, will demonstrate other gestures that characterize him as a submissive recipient, and a domineering person will show his aggressiveness. If two powerful people greet each other, a symbolic struggle occurs between them, during which each tries to subjugate the opponent’s hand. Often this struggle results in an equal handshake in which both hands remain vertical and both people develop a sense of mutual respect. This is exactly the kind of handshake that a father teaches his son when he asks him to greet him “like a man.”

If you are greeting a powerful person, it is very difficult to persuade him to shake hands equally, and even more difficult to do it in the least noticeable way. Previously, we have already considered one of the ways to return the initiative to our own hands, but now the time has come to introduce another method of disarming such people. It will allow you not only to take control of the situation, but also to confuse the recipient with an invasion of your personal zone.

To learn this technique, you need to train the following movements:

• Movement one. When you take the power person's hand, step forward with your left foot. I recommend that you always lean forward to shake hands with your left leg, even if you do not use the technique described. This will give you room to maneuver and allow you to neutralize a dominant handshake if something happens.
• Movement two. Move your right foot forward and stand in front of the recipient on the left, moving into his personal area.
• Movement three. Place your left foot behind your right and shake your partner's hand.

This technique allows you to bring your opponent’s palm to a different position, as well as become the master of the situation, since you have violated your partner’s intimate area.

Other types of handshakes

Finally

Well, in this article we have briefly, but as informatively as possible, understood the types of handshakes, and also understood several basic rules of etiquette. As we found out, a handshake can make it clear what kind of person is in front of us, and, as they say, whoever has the information controls the situation.

Take care of your time and all the best to you!

When we try to take someone's hand, we are invading their personal space, we must always remember this. This zone can be thought of as an air bubble, which each of us inflates and contracts depending on the circumstances. And we would rather agree to narrow its boundaries in a crowded subway car than, say, in an office.

Define the boundaries of personal space

The dimensions of personal space depend on a person’s background, his social status, personal preferences, culture, as well as the degree of acquaintance with those who approach him. According to the American anthropologist Edward T. Hall, on average up to 0.5 m is occupied by the intimate zone, intended for those closest to you; from 0.5 m to 1.2 m - a personal area for communicating with close friends, from 1.2 m to 3.7 m - a social area, suitable for business communication. Violation of these boundaries by strangers makes us feel uncomfortable.

For this reason, it is right to keep your distance at the beginning of a relationship. And touching another person's hand - even if it is not a romantic gesture at all - is preferable at the appropriate time and in the appropriate situation. Your attempt to touch someone you just met may irritate the other person, although he will smile sweetly back, not wanting to offend you. As the relationship develops, we allow the other closer to our intimate zone.

Find out the interlocutor's intentions

There is an easy way to find out whether the other person is ready to let you into his personal space - move your personal belongings (for example, a purse, a notebook, cigarettes) closer to him. Such objects are perceived by others as an extension of our body. When you sit with someone else at the same table, you follow the unspoken rule that half the table is yours and half is the other person's space.

A stranger will most likely perceive the “invasion” of your items into their territory with irritation, and you will notice their discomfort. Only close friends, family members and lovers are oblivious to these movements. If a woman moves her bag closer to a man, this may be a sign that she likes him and would like a closer relationship.

Consider cultural differences

Like all nonverbal gestures, tactile contact is perceived differently in different cultures. In the West, holding hands is a romantic gesture. When we see two people joining their palms, we can easily assume that they have a close relationship. Therefore, if you do not want to be misunderstood, do not hold hands with people you are not interested in, even if they are the first to make contact.

Many Western men do not hold each other's hands for fear of being mistaken for homosexuals. But in Arab culture, this is a friendly gesture that has nothing to do with sexual orientation.

What does this gesture mean? When a man takes a woman's hand, it can also mean several things:

• romantic affection and deep connection;
• uncertainty or fear of losing it;
• trying to calm her down when she's upset;
• superiority - he is the one who plays the main role in the relationship;
• an attempt to show the whole world that she belongs to him and only him;
• showing off;
• he is proud to be seen next to this woman, but this does not mean that he values ​​​​his relationship with her.

Taller or stronger?

Most books on body language will tell you that when partners hold hands, the leader's hand is always on top. However, a study by psychologists at Temple University (Philadelphia), conducted back in 1998, showed that there may be other factors that influence the way we hold hands:

Floor: The man's hand in a heterosexual couple is much more likely to be over the woman's hand (regardless of their relationship).

Height: in a couple where the man is taller or the same height as the partner, his hand is on top more often than in a couple where the man is shorter than the woman.

What to do if your lover doesn't want to take your hand?

Walking hand in hand through the streets is not a pleasure for everyone. Many people do not consider it necessary to publicly demonstrate their feelings, no matter how deep they may be. If your husband or wife avoids such poetic settings, this does not mean that he (she) does not love you. Most likely, he finds it difficult to relax in public places. Perhaps he (she) is afraid that, having discovered his love for you, he will look weak, vulnerable, infantile. Changing this belief is not easy, but you can try the following:

1. Before you grab your companion's hand in public, conduct the experiment described above to understand whether he is in the mood for tactile contact with you in principle. If he keeps his distance, don't take it personally. Instead of being offended, gently explain that the touch of loved ones is calming and helps you feel better.
2. Work on your relationship as a whole: if you don't have the desire to hug and touch each other when you're alone, then it's hard to expect that desire to appear in public.
3. Be honest with yourself: do you want to hold your partner's hand in public because you love him or because you want to show others that this is your boyfriend/girlfriend? Or to prove that you have power over him? If your intentions are not pure, your partner may feel hurt.